here's something that might work...
http://capwiz.com/sosnow/issues/alert/?alertid=11571321
Wednesday, July 9
Tuesday, July 8
Tuesday, May 13
thoughts
Yesterday I was walking down Hlavna going to Tesco and I saw two ladies, one of them carrying a kid about 12 months old. Then kid proceeded to spit/throw up on his mom's shirt and the two ladies stopped to clean up the mess, and also to laugh and talk about how cute it was that he threw up on one of them.
Now, maybe you have kids and this is cute to you, but to me, it's kinda gross. But then I started thinking about how God views us that way. When we become new believers we do so many things that are still disgusting and painful. The whole time God just looks at us like a father and cleans up our mess and even extends a little grace by admiring our effort to just live life with him.
This was all good and well until I took that thought further and considered what happens when we grow up. Well, we stop throwing up...on purpose, at least. And why do we stop doing things that are disgusting and inappropriate? Simply because that is what is expected of a mature person.
And so it is in our walk with God. As we begin to grow up and learn more about God, He asks us to get rid of things that, in reality, are ridiculous; those things in our life which break fellowship with God, sin.
All this to say that I've been realizing more and more the sin in me that God wants to remove. He's showing me the things in my life that are disgusting and not what He wants. But to be honest, I often whine and complain about the fact I have to grow up and act like a "mature" Christian. But once again, the reality of this life with God is that I must move forward. If I truly belong to Him, I must remove those things which grieve Him. It's hard, really hard, but I think it's worth it in the end.
Now, maybe you have kids and this is cute to you, but to me, it's kinda gross. But then I started thinking about how God views us that way. When we become new believers we do so many things that are still disgusting and painful. The whole time God just looks at us like a father and cleans up our mess and even extends a little grace by admiring our effort to just live life with him.
This was all good and well until I took that thought further and considered what happens when we grow up. Well, we stop throwing up...on purpose, at least. And why do we stop doing things that are disgusting and inappropriate? Simply because that is what is expected of a mature person.
And so it is in our walk with God. As we begin to grow up and learn more about God, He asks us to get rid of things that, in reality, are ridiculous; those things in our life which break fellowship with God, sin.
All this to say that I've been realizing more and more the sin in me that God wants to remove. He's showing me the things in my life that are disgusting and not what He wants. But to be honest, I often whine and complain about the fact I have to grow up and act like a "mature" Christian. But once again, the reality of this life with God is that I must move forward. If I truly belong to Him, I must remove those things which grieve Him. It's hard, really hard, but I think it's worth it in the end.
Friday, April 11
a good night of prayer
Tonight was a pretty good night. We had a small, intimate meeting of students to pray for the movement here and just our lives. We were really hoping for the best, which means about 10 students, since about 99% of students go home as soon as their classes are done on either Thursday or Friday. I invited most of my guys and had two show up: Ivan and Jozo.
It was such a blessing because I was able to pair up with Jozo and his girlfriend, Baska. Since Jozo is pretty new to SHPK, our movement, he had the chance to see what we're about and even hear about our mission trip to Serbia this summer. You can be praying that the Lord would challenge Jozo and Baska to come to Serbia with us this summer. We're trusting God to use this summer project to radically change some students lives, and challenge some students to step up and lead the movement next year.
Afterwards we got some ice cream and just laughed at all the drunk people yelling in the streets about the hockey game their team just lost. All in all, a good night.
Oh yeah, tonight there was a thunderstorm while we were praying. But it was so refreshing because I don't think I have heard thunder since being here in Slovakia. And it was like God was saying, "I'm listening!" It feels so great when you have those moments that you just connect with God and feel like you are so personally close to Him. For me, that's thunder.
best wishes and thunderstorms for you,
Matt
It was such a blessing because I was able to pair up with Jozo and his girlfriend, Baska. Since Jozo is pretty new to SHPK, our movement, he had the chance to see what we're about and even hear about our mission trip to Serbia this summer. You can be praying that the Lord would challenge Jozo and Baska to come to Serbia with us this summer. We're trusting God to use this summer project to radically change some students lives, and challenge some students to step up and lead the movement next year.
Afterwards we got some ice cream and just laughed at all the drunk people yelling in the streets about the hockey game their team just lost. All in all, a good night.
Oh yeah, tonight there was a thunderstorm while we were praying. But it was so refreshing because I don't think I have heard thunder since being here in Slovakia. And it was like God was saying, "I'm listening!" It feels so great when you have those moments that you just connect with God and feel like you are so personally close to Him. For me, that's thunder.
best wishes and thunderstorms for you,
Matt
Tuesday, April 1
Me and Aaron walk up to three students sitting at a table in the school's corridor. It looks like they are studying, but I ask the Lord for His power and presence and then ask them, in Slovak, if they speak English. I seem to recognize one of the guys from before but he doesn't seem to recognize me. I ask them if they have time to take a survey. They answer yes with some reluctance, but that has never stopped me before. I hand the pictures to the guy across the table who seems to be most interested. I ask him the first question, "Which three pictures describe your life right now?"
Soularium is a great evangelistic tool we have been using on campus the past few months. It involves fifty pictures of all types and categories, and five questions to engage the person in spiritual conversation. Things like "which picture describes God?" and "what picture depicts what you wish were true about your spiritual life." That last question is sometimes very hard to translate, but it's amazing how many times the Holy Spirit steps in an does the work.
As I'm asking Stanley these questions I can tell he is thinking about them a lot. He's taking his time to make sure his answer is the right one. His classmates begin to leave and I'm afraid he's going to leave also, but he continues to engage with the pictures.
I move a little closer so I can try to understand his Slovak. At this point I can tell this is going to be a good conversation because of the way he is reacting. He's getting a little fidgety, a little unsettled. He picks out a picture of a girl playing with balloons on green grass. I ask him what that means and he says he wants to be happier with God. The last picture he picked was of a dark scene with no hope in sight. I asked him, "How do you plan to get from here to here?" He thinks for a few minutes and then says, "By praying more and going to church. I want someone in my life who is above and can help me become a better person."
"If I could explain to you how you can be happy with God and have a relationship with Him, would you want to hear about it?"
He is very skeptical, like most Slovaks who don't trust just any ol' stranger who walks up to him. But he says yes!
I had him the "Knowing God Personally" booklet and flip open to law one. I can tell he is on the verge of saying no and walking away. So I pray that the Lord would keep him right there and allow me to get through the booklet. Stanley is distracted by things around him; his friends passing by, a woman who sits down across from us, his own sinful nature.
Suddenly, the woman across from me says, "Excuse me, what are you talking about?" I'm a little thrown back by the fact this Slovak woman, who is probably a professor, just asked me THAT question in perfect English. I stumble and make a few noises and then say, "We're talking about God."
She's a little taken back herself.
So I refocus my attention on sharing with Stanley and we make it to the part that talks about Christ being on the throne of your life, or self being on the throne. I ask Stanley which one he is and he says, "the one without Jesus."
Wow, a Slovak who will actually admit that he's NOT a Christian. So many students grow up in a Catholic society and they think being born into the church makes them a believer.
I read the prayer to Stanley and ask him if he wants to do this. I can tell he is having a very hard time with all this, and the HS is busy at work in his heart. I ask what's holding him back but he still doesn't answer. I ask if he's afraid and he slowly nods his head. "Afraid of losing you friends?" I ask. "Yes," he says. I talk with him a little bit more about what it means to truly be a believer and encourage him to think about it some more. I ask him if we can meet up again but he is hesitant. So many thoughts must be rushing through his head. "I want this but it means I have to give up my job, my friends," he says. I leave Stanley my email and mobil number and tell him to please call me after the holidays.
It was hard to let it go without any solid follow-up contact info, but I just have to trust God. Well, that's not a surprise since faith has been the theme of my STINT year.
Soularium is a great evangelistic tool we have been using on campus the past few months. It involves fifty pictures of all types and categories, and five questions to engage the person in spiritual conversation. Things like "which picture describes God?" and "what picture depicts what you wish were true about your spiritual life." That last question is sometimes very hard to translate, but it's amazing how many times the Holy Spirit steps in an does the work.
As I'm asking Stanley these questions I can tell he is thinking about them a lot. He's taking his time to make sure his answer is the right one. His classmates begin to leave and I'm afraid he's going to leave also, but he continues to engage with the pictures.
I move a little closer so I can try to understand his Slovak. At this point I can tell this is going to be a good conversation because of the way he is reacting. He's getting a little fidgety, a little unsettled. He picks out a picture of a girl playing with balloons on green grass. I ask him what that means and he says he wants to be happier with God. The last picture he picked was of a dark scene with no hope in sight. I asked him, "How do you plan to get from here to here?" He thinks for a few minutes and then says, "By praying more and going to church. I want someone in my life who is above and can help me become a better person."
"If I could explain to you how you can be happy with God and have a relationship with Him, would you want to hear about it?"
He is very skeptical, like most Slovaks who don't trust just any ol' stranger who walks up to him. But he says yes!
I had him the "Knowing God Personally" booklet and flip open to law one. I can tell he is on the verge of saying no and walking away. So I pray that the Lord would keep him right there and allow me to get through the booklet. Stanley is distracted by things around him; his friends passing by, a woman who sits down across from us, his own sinful nature.
Suddenly, the woman across from me says, "Excuse me, what are you talking about?" I'm a little thrown back by the fact this Slovak woman, who is probably a professor, just asked me THAT question in perfect English. I stumble and make a few noises and then say, "We're talking about God."
She's a little taken back herself.
So I refocus my attention on sharing with Stanley and we make it to the part that talks about Christ being on the throne of your life, or self being on the throne. I ask Stanley which one he is and he says, "the one without Jesus."
Wow, a Slovak who will actually admit that he's NOT a Christian. So many students grow up in a Catholic society and they think being born into the church makes them a believer.
I read the prayer to Stanley and ask him if he wants to do this. I can tell he is having a very hard time with all this, and the HS is busy at work in his heart. I ask what's holding him back but he still doesn't answer. I ask if he's afraid and he slowly nods his head. "Afraid of losing you friends?" I ask. "Yes," he says. I talk with him a little bit more about what it means to truly be a believer and encourage him to think about it some more. I ask him if we can meet up again but he is hesitant. So many thoughts must be rushing through his head. "I want this but it means I have to give up my job, my friends," he says. I leave Stanley my email and mobil number and tell him to please call me after the holidays.
It was hard to let it go without any solid follow-up contact info, but I just have to trust God. Well, that's not a surprise since faith has been the theme of my STINT year.
Monday, March 17
halusky and good convo
Today was a pretty good day. I sent off my signed tax form to get my refund back, watched Kelly and Biba do some crazy dances, got more excited about my trip to Serbia coming up on Thursday, went to the gym, had some guys come over and cook me halusky (traditional Slovak dish), and talked to them about Jesus. All in all I would say it was a pretty good day. We have a short week this week with only one more day on campus tomorrow. Me and Aaron are hoping to play some American football with some guys in Presov, and then who knows what.
Oh yeah, I'm meeting a student Wednesday morning to go to a paint store and buy some oils so I can start painting again, here in Slovakia. Better late then never I guess.
here's to homemade halusky and tax refunds,
Matt
Oh yeah, I'm meeting a student Wednesday morning to go to a paint store and buy some oils so I can start painting again, here in Slovakia. Better late then never I guess.
here's to homemade halusky and tax refunds,
Matt
Wednesday, February 27
faithfulness
This week has been one of challenges, but I have been encouraged from the Lord.
Today as I was walking to campus and thinking about what was going to happen, I simply asked God for His eyes. I recently read in a book about an Indian native missionary who began to see people the way God did and it made him weep for those people. I have to admit that I almost never look at Slovaks, or anyone who doesn't follow Christ, in this way. I also asked God to lead me to the right people He had prepared for this day...and He did.
Time after time I met Slovak guys who seemed genuinely interested in English club (which is our next big outreach event for the next two weeks). Men who could speak enough English to be interested...and also intrigued by meeting an American. So I'll continue to pray for God's faithfulness in their lives, and in mine.
Today as I was walking to campus and thinking about what was going to happen, I simply asked God for His eyes. I recently read in a book about an Indian native missionary who began to see people the way God did and it made him weep for those people. I have to admit that I almost never look at Slovaks, or anyone who doesn't follow Christ, in this way. I also asked God to lead me to the right people He had prepared for this day...and He did.
Time after time I met Slovak guys who seemed genuinely interested in English club (which is our next big outreach event for the next two weeks). Men who could speak enough English to be interested...and also intrigued by meeting an American. So I'll continue to pray for God's faithfulness in their lives, and in mine.
Monday, February 11
He's the God of Košice and Presov
Wow, what a day! Where do I start?
Today was our first day preparing for the upcoming semester. We had some good time off to relax and rest up from all the craziness over the break. We all spent some time with the Lord this afternoon asking Him for vision.
Honestly, I wasn't really feeling it, but since it's my job (which, by the way, I LOVE my job) I decided to go for it. So I took off....
...and found myself out in the middle of the woods sitting on a pile of logs on the side of a dirt road. For a long time I was wondering what the Lord wanted to tell me because I wasn't hearing much from Him. Although, I was pretty convicted about sharing my faith more boldly on campus this semester. So many times I go on campus reluctant and powerless...not filled with the Spirit. I can think back to many times this year when God has shown Himself faithful and then I turn around and forget His goodness.
Na pri klad (for example): this weekend me and Aaron went hiking with a student named Lukas. It was an amazing trip filled with conversation about what it really means to have salvation, what repentace is, and I even got to explain a few things in Slovak, which is a pure miracle if you know me. By the way, PLEASE pray for Lukas. I think he is really close to accepting Christ!
Back to today, I was just sitting there doubting what He could do this semester and how He is ever going to show up in these students' lives. So when we meet back we talked about what we heard from the Lord and I was feeling pretty much at a loss for words....just trying to engage the team in conversation and find something constructive to work with (which often times happens to me). Then Kelly shared a song with us. It's called "God of this city" by Chris Tomlin. Can I just say it explains EXACTLY where we are at. Some of us have been looking to the past and wondering if God is still working here.
The song says:
You're the God of this city
You're the King of these people
You're the Lord of this nation
You are
You're the Light in this darkness
You're the Hope to the hopeless
You're the Peace to the restless
You are
There is no one like our God...
There is no one like our God...
For greater things have yet to come, and greater things are still to be done in this city
Greater things have yet to come, and greater things are still to be done in this city
YES! This is what we are believing God for. He CAN be the God of not just this city, but this nation of Slovakia. He can be hope to the hopeless and peace to the restless. We want the lives of students to be radically changed by the person of Jesus Christ.
Oh, wait. There's more and it gets better. Later we all went to eat at Pizza Hut. Then Dara suggested that we all get some ice cream, so we went to Aida...the big ice cream place here. While we are standing around two gypsy kids walk up to me asking for change and so I offer to buy them ice cream after Biba tells me, "Don't just stand there, give them something." I buy them ice cream and then realize I can give them a knowing God personally booklet. So I ask my team if someone has one and Carlyn pulls one out of her backpack. I hand it to them and they look it over one good time. Then Mirka steps in and starts talking to them about this booklet, which is in Slovak and describes how someone can begin a relationship with Christ. Mirka makes it all the way through the booklet with the boys and then she steps aside with one of them...
..."wait, is she doing what I think she is doing?" I'm thinking. I look over at Biba and she nods her head and says, "He just prayed the prayer." Then I proceed to yell, "WHAT?!" in the middle of Aida.
Mirka comes over and tells us, "We have a new brother in Christ." The sad part about all this is that we have no way of following up with him so all we can do is pray that what he just did will truly make sense to him and that God will bring about change in his life. But SERIOUSLY! How crazy is that?! Just like God to do that.
While we are walking back home we realize that we all played a role in sharing the gospel with that one boy, Eric. At this very moment I am still shocked at how God used us AS A TEAM to bring about His glory. That is something we want to work toward more this semester, really working as one unit to take this movement forward. Would you PRAY that we would seek that out?
praying for this city,
Matt
Today was our first day preparing for the upcoming semester. We had some good time off to relax and rest up from all the craziness over the break. We all spent some time with the Lord this afternoon asking Him for vision.
Honestly, I wasn't really feeling it, but since it's my job (which, by the way, I LOVE my job) I decided to go for it. So I took off....
...and found myself out in the middle of the woods sitting on a pile of logs on the side of a dirt road. For a long time I was wondering what the Lord wanted to tell me because I wasn't hearing much from Him. Although, I was pretty convicted about sharing my faith more boldly on campus this semester. So many times I go on campus reluctant and powerless...not filled with the Spirit. I can think back to many times this year when God has shown Himself faithful and then I turn around and forget His goodness.
Na pri klad (for example): this weekend me and Aaron went hiking with a student named Lukas. It was an amazing trip filled with conversation about what it really means to have salvation, what repentace is, and I even got to explain a few things in Slovak, which is a pure miracle if you know me. By the way, PLEASE pray for Lukas. I think he is really close to accepting Christ!
Back to today, I was just sitting there doubting what He could do this semester and how He is ever going to show up in these students' lives. So when we meet back we talked about what we heard from the Lord and I was feeling pretty much at a loss for words....just trying to engage the team in conversation and find something constructive to work with (which often times happens to me). Then Kelly shared a song with us. It's called "God of this city" by Chris Tomlin. Can I just say it explains EXACTLY where we are at. Some of us have been looking to the past and wondering if God is still working here.
The song says:
You're the God of this city
You're the King of these people
You're the Lord of this nation
You are
You're the Light in this darkness
You're the Hope to the hopeless
You're the Peace to the restless
You are
There is no one like our God...
There is no one like our God...
For greater things have yet to come, and greater things are still to be done in this city
Greater things have yet to come, and greater things are still to be done in this city
YES! This is what we are believing God for. He CAN be the God of not just this city, but this nation of Slovakia. He can be hope to the hopeless and peace to the restless. We want the lives of students to be radically changed by the person of Jesus Christ.
Oh, wait. There's more and it gets better. Later we all went to eat at Pizza Hut. Then Dara suggested that we all get some ice cream, so we went to Aida...the big ice cream place here. While we are standing around two gypsy kids walk up to me asking for change and so I offer to buy them ice cream after Biba tells me, "Don't just stand there, give them something." I buy them ice cream and then realize I can give them a knowing God personally booklet. So I ask my team if someone has one and Carlyn pulls one out of her backpack. I hand it to them and they look it over one good time. Then Mirka steps in and starts talking to them about this booklet, which is in Slovak and describes how someone can begin a relationship with Christ. Mirka makes it all the way through the booklet with the boys and then she steps aside with one of them...
..."wait, is she doing what I think she is doing?" I'm thinking. I look over at Biba and she nods her head and says, "He just prayed the prayer." Then I proceed to yell, "WHAT?!" in the middle of Aida.
Mirka comes over and tells us, "We have a new brother in Christ." The sad part about all this is that we have no way of following up with him so all we can do is pray that what he just did will truly make sense to him and that God will bring about change in his life. But SERIOUSLY! How crazy is that?! Just like God to do that.
While we are walking back home we realize that we all played a role in sharing the gospel with that one boy, Eric. At this very moment I am still shocked at how God used us AS A TEAM to bring about His glory. That is something we want to work toward more this semester, really working as one unit to take this movement forward. Would you PRAY that we would seek that out?
praying for this city,
Matt
Sunday, February 3
Today is a beautiful day. The first one in a few months. It's not too cold, sunny, no wind. Just perfect. In fact, it must be a day to throw the frisbee. I'm really hoping somebody will come along with me or I will be forced to throw the frisbee with myself.
Things feel kinda weird for me. We are about to gear up for another semester on campus but honestly I'm not ready for it...and not very excited. I have a lot of doubts in my mind that keep overtaking me. I would like to tell you that I always believe God to do big things or even just to comfort me in my fear, but many times this year I have had to force myself to step out in faith. I have had to fully rely on the Lord for guidance since I really don't have much to offer to this team or to these Slovaks.
But despite my despair 99% of the time, God does give me glimpses of His goodness and promise. At the end of Luke, which I just finished reading, two men are on their way to Emmaus after Jesus is killed. When Jesus comes along side them they are two busy talking among themselves to see that their Savior is walking with them. Later, after Jesus reveals Himself to them, they say, "Weren't our hearts burning when He spoke the Scriptures to us?"
Now when I first read this I didn't think much about it. But then that very same day, Larry Thompson spoke about this passage at our last night of the AOA conference. He didn't really add anything profound, but it was just the fact that I had read it earlier that the Lord spoke to me and said, "HEY! I'm real. And I'm here. Trust me."
So that's what I'm trying to do...trust God. It's not easy, by any means. But I don't really have another choice in this situation, thankfully.
Mat'ko
Things feel kinda weird for me. We are about to gear up for another semester on campus but honestly I'm not ready for it...and not very excited. I have a lot of doubts in my mind that keep overtaking me. I would like to tell you that I always believe God to do big things or even just to comfort me in my fear, but many times this year I have had to force myself to step out in faith. I have had to fully rely on the Lord for guidance since I really don't have much to offer to this team or to these Slovaks.
But despite my despair 99% of the time, God does give me glimpses of His goodness and promise. At the end of Luke, which I just finished reading, two men are on their way to Emmaus after Jesus is killed. When Jesus comes along side them they are two busy talking among themselves to see that their Savior is walking with them. Later, after Jesus reveals Himself to them, they say, "Weren't our hearts burning when He spoke the Scriptures to us?"
Now when I first read this I didn't think much about it. But then that very same day, Larry Thompson spoke about this passage at our last night of the AOA conference. He didn't really add anything profound, but it was just the fact that I had read it earlier that the Lord spoke to me and said, "HEY! I'm real. And I'm here. Trust me."
So that's what I'm trying to do...trust God. It's not easy, by any means. But I don't really have another choice in this situation, thankfully.
Mat'ko
Sunday, January 27
what is my life right now?
A few days ago I returned from about 12 days of attending conferences in Hungary. First all five of us Americans were in Vajta, Hungary (find that on a map if you can). We saw other STINTers from about seven or eight other locations in our area of affairs, which is Eastern Europe and Russia (also Israel).
We stayed at a really nice place called Calvary Chapel and all of our meetings were in this old restored mansion in the middle of Hungarian countryside. Can I just say it was amazing? One day as about 12 of us American boys were outside playing football, my friend Jonathan said, "It feels like we are all in a really big, rich family and we are just playing some Thanksgiving day football." It was so much fun, and so needed.
I was able to meet with the Lord and gain some clear guidance about where He wants me next year. For a while I have been juggling whether I should stay for another year in Slovakia or return to the states in order to join staff with Campus Crusade. God really answered some of my questions, and more importantly, gave me peace admist my doubts about why He wants me back home next year. So I did decide that I will be joining full-time staff with Crusade next year, which basically means I will start raising support when I get back from Slovakia.
So on to the next conference, our all staff Area of Affairs conference. Once again, I had more time to hang out with new freinds and be encouraged from the Word by speakers and friends. We heard many stories about what God is doing in different countries in this area. It was a huge breath of fresh air to hear that God is moving in visible ways among this culture-type. For example, this past semester 34 Russian students and 100 Ukrainian students accepted Christ. Many times its hard to trust God for what He is doing here in Slovakia given that we have not seen much fruit recently. But I trust that His perfect plan is being played out through me.
It's been kinda hard adjusting back to life in "the real world." I returned to Kosice and realized that I had lost a little bit of my language abilities, and that my attitude toward people around me was one more of judgement than mercy. I realize how easy it is for us, as Christians, to get into our bubble of friends and never want to engage with non-believers; I wouldn't do it if it wasn't my job, simply because it's really hard. It forces me to analyze what I say I believe and actually put it into practice. One thing that the Lord has been teaching me this year is that many times what I say I believe doesn't often line up with what my actions profess. That is sin on my part, and God's mercy on His part.
truth and grace to you,
Matt
We stayed at a really nice place called Calvary Chapel and all of our meetings were in this old restored mansion in the middle of Hungarian countryside. Can I just say it was amazing? One day as about 12 of us American boys were outside playing football, my friend Jonathan said, "It feels like we are all in a really big, rich family and we are just playing some Thanksgiving day football." It was so much fun, and so needed.
I was able to meet with the Lord and gain some clear guidance about where He wants me next year. For a while I have been juggling whether I should stay for another year in Slovakia or return to the states in order to join staff with Campus Crusade. God really answered some of my questions, and more importantly, gave me peace admist my doubts about why He wants me back home next year. So I did decide that I will be joining full-time staff with Crusade next year, which basically means I will start raising support when I get back from Slovakia.
So on to the next conference, our all staff Area of Affairs conference. Once again, I had more time to hang out with new freinds and be encouraged from the Word by speakers and friends. We heard many stories about what God is doing in different countries in this area. It was a huge breath of fresh air to hear that God is moving in visible ways among this culture-type. For example, this past semester 34 Russian students and 100 Ukrainian students accepted Christ. Many times its hard to trust God for what He is doing here in Slovakia given that we have not seen much fruit recently. But I trust that His perfect plan is being played out through me.
It's been kinda hard adjusting back to life in "the real world." I returned to Kosice and realized that I had lost a little bit of my language abilities, and that my attitude toward people around me was one more of judgement than mercy. I realize how easy it is for us, as Christians, to get into our bubble of friends and never want to engage with non-believers; I wouldn't do it if it wasn't my job, simply because it's really hard. It forces me to analyze what I say I believe and actually put it into practice. One thing that the Lord has been teaching me this year is that many times what I say I believe doesn't often line up with what my actions profess. That is sin on my part, and God's mercy on His part.
truth and grace to you,
Matt
Tuesday, January 8
slúžit' (to serve)
I was reading in Luke chapter 17 this morning and came across this passage: "He does not thank the slave because he did the things which were commanded, does he? So you too, when you do all the things which are commanded you, say, 'We are unworthy slaves; we have done only that which we ought to have done." This really struck me because in the past few months I think I have become expectant of God. I often times find myself expecting Him to bless me because of what I am doing here. I think I somehow deserve His blessing and good hand upon me. But then God reminds me that I am merely doing what I have been commanded to do as a bondservant of Christ. And the reality is that I should count it a blessing just to be a slave for Christ. So I want to encourage you to rethink the way you view your "work" for the Lord. Are you doing it with a wrongly expectant heart? Because if you are, God is not hesitant to alter your view. Let me encourage you to return to the Lord and thank Him for the privilege it is to serve Him, and to maintain a pure heart admist it all.
Wednesday, December 26
some thoughts during the holiday season
This was actually a journal entry I wrote on the 24th of this month, Christmas Eve:
"Well, it's actually going to happen, Christmas in Slovakia. I can't believe this is about to happen. I don't have many other thoughts about it. Rachel did make one good point that being away from home can be good b/c it can force us to really focus on Christ this year and not necessarily our families or friends; just the birth of our Savior Christ.
I was just reading in Luke about the parable of the sower. I started to think about how the sower was obedient to what God wanted him to do, sow the word of God into people's hearts and lives. Most of the times the sower put seed out it got trampled or taken away or choked out. Only 25% of the time did the seed he threw come to bear fruit. But he wasn't worried about all that, he knew what his task was and kept the results truly up to God. We so often talk about how we should leave the results up to God, but many times that is really hard to do.
But a lot of things in life are hard; life is hard. I must press on with faith and ask the Spirit to change me. It is said that successful sharing is sharing Christ by the Holy Spirit and leaving the results up to God. If I look at this definition and measure myself to it I have failed horribly. I often share out of my own strength and then get upset when I dont' see results. How selfish am I really? How selfish do I have to be in order to expect God to bless what I do out of my own power? I've got to be a total idiot.
If God's truth does endure to all generations then I can rejoice that He is working still among all the sin of this generation. It often seems hard to find, though."
I can honestly say this has been my semester; most of the time failing at sharing the gospel with the power of the Spirit. But I'm learning and God is showing me the true meaning and purpose behind sharing my faith.
cheers,
Matt
ps - Christmas in Slovakia was great!
"Well, it's actually going to happen, Christmas in Slovakia. I can't believe this is about to happen. I don't have many other thoughts about it. Rachel did make one good point that being away from home can be good b/c it can force us to really focus on Christ this year and not necessarily our families or friends; just the birth of our Savior Christ.
I was just reading in Luke about the parable of the sower. I started to think about how the sower was obedient to what God wanted him to do, sow the word of God into people's hearts and lives. Most of the times the sower put seed out it got trampled or taken away or choked out. Only 25% of the time did the seed he threw come to bear fruit. But he wasn't worried about all that, he knew what his task was and kept the results truly up to God. We so often talk about how we should leave the results up to God, but many times that is really hard to do.
But a lot of things in life are hard; life is hard. I must press on with faith and ask the Spirit to change me. It is said that successful sharing is sharing Christ by the Holy Spirit and leaving the results up to God. If I look at this definition and measure myself to it I have failed horribly. I often share out of my own strength and then get upset when I dont' see results. How selfish am I really? How selfish do I have to be in order to expect God to bless what I do out of my own power? I've got to be a total idiot.
If God's truth does endure to all generations then I can rejoice that He is working still among all the sin of this generation. It often seems hard to find, though."
I can honestly say this has been my semester; most of the time failing at sharing the gospel with the power of the Spirit. But I'm learning and God is showing me the true meaning and purpose behind sharing my faith.
cheers,
Matt
ps - Christmas in Slovakia was great!
Thursday, November 29
coming to a close
The semester is quickly coming to a close. It's sad yet exciting at the same time. On one hand, I have made it a little over three months. That is surely by the grace of God. On the other, I often feel like we have not accomplished much, and even regret not being able to adjust more quickly. It's really hard to not be critical of myself, but I'm learning how to live in grace. A lot has happened this semester and I have learned many things. Which include, but are not limited to, the following:
- I am WAY too prideful of who I think I am when in reality I'm pretty ignorant
- God is the only one who can initiate and sustain any type of spiritual change in people's lives
- doing ministry overseas, where you know just about nothing, really points out the sin in your life
- there are A LOT of people who have no clue what it means to have faith in Christ...and I mean this pretty much anwhere you go in the world
- I appreciate my family so much more
- ministry is really hard but God has not called me to an easy life; He never asks His followers to do easy things in life. He wants full obedience and trust.
Despite the semester coming to a close, I am looking forward to the four conferences, wedding of Jeremy and Dara, and trip to Rome during the break. Gonna be loads of fun.
Until next time, kids.
- I am WAY too prideful of who I think I am when in reality I'm pretty ignorant
- God is the only one who can initiate and sustain any type of spiritual change in people's lives
- doing ministry overseas, where you know just about nothing, really points out the sin in your life
- there are A LOT of people who have no clue what it means to have faith in Christ...and I mean this pretty much anwhere you go in the world
- I appreciate my family so much more
- ministry is really hard but God has not called me to an easy life; He never asks His followers to do easy things in life. He wants full obedience and trust.
Despite the semester coming to a close, I am looking forward to the four conferences, wedding of Jeremy and Dara, and trip to Rome during the break. Gonna be loads of fun.
Until next time, kids.
Sunday, November 4
starting over
I'm sitting in the hospital hallway listening to some Tifah on my laptop...and thinking about what is going to happen next. So what is God going to do with everything now? Where is He going to lead me...or even better, how is He going to rework everything that I know?
The past few days here have been much better than the first. I actually started to lose some of the bitterness of being here and being in this situation. I started to release some of the resentment and guilt of my inadequacies. It has taken me the whole time here to finally realize why the Lord brought me to this point:
He is starting things over with me.
Or at least that's what I'm hearing from Him. Now, I have to admit I have no clue what that means. Will I finally be disciplined to read the Word every day? Or pray constantly? Maybe not. Maybe it's something deeper. He's bringing me to the point of recognizing exactly why I'm in Slovakia this year...no, why I even follow Him to begin with.
Why do I follow Jesus, anyways? It sure isn't safe. I don't know the plans of my life. My sinful self gets mad when things go bad because I think God is not good. My life is still hard; why is that? I didn't sign up for this. But I think I'm starting to see a light to all my answers.
That same light that I'm looking toward is the same one that gave me life in the first place, and is the same one that is sending me out even now. Now I don't want to get too deep or spiritual on you. In simple terms, I'm learning how to deal with the mess. That's all it really is: finding life in the middle of the mess. Yeah, sure, it's easy to live life when things are good. But life is still messy in the middle of all that. We still deal with our sinful self and are tempted to withold glory from the Lord.
So back to the whole starting over thing. Coming into this year my mind was totally set on what my relationship with Jesus should look like in order for me to be happy this year...and be effective in ministry. But I think that stems from a wrong belief that I have to be something in order for God to use me.
Before you go off thinking that I'm going to talk about how His power is made perfect in weakness, and then lose you, I want to say something. There's something about all this that goes so much deeper. It's my life; it's who I am. It hits you harder when it's your life. Now, don't get me wrong. All the forementioned is good and true. And yes, this is a simple thought, but one that I honestly haven't wrestled with much. So I'm having to learn how to wrestle with it. And in this time, literally.
So maybe all I'm saying is that I'm finally at the point where I can be comfortable with this. It's sad that God had to use extreme measures to get me here, but that's how He deals with things. I don't understand it, but that's kinda beautiful.
Honestly, all this is still jumbled up in my head and not making much sense. But I have to start somewhere with this whole process. It will truly be a miracle if I grasp onto anything that God is teaching me. Please pray that it does.
caught in the middle,
Matt
The past few days here have been much better than the first. I actually started to lose some of the bitterness of being here and being in this situation. I started to release some of the resentment and guilt of my inadequacies. It has taken me the whole time here to finally realize why the Lord brought me to this point:
He is starting things over with me.
Or at least that's what I'm hearing from Him. Now, I have to admit I have no clue what that means. Will I finally be disciplined to read the Word every day? Or pray constantly? Maybe not. Maybe it's something deeper. He's bringing me to the point of recognizing exactly why I'm in Slovakia this year...no, why I even follow Him to begin with.
Why do I follow Jesus, anyways? It sure isn't safe. I don't know the plans of my life. My sinful self gets mad when things go bad because I think God is not good. My life is still hard; why is that? I didn't sign up for this. But I think I'm starting to see a light to all my answers.
That same light that I'm looking toward is the same one that gave me life in the first place, and is the same one that is sending me out even now. Now I don't want to get too deep or spiritual on you. In simple terms, I'm learning how to deal with the mess. That's all it really is: finding life in the middle of the mess. Yeah, sure, it's easy to live life when things are good. But life is still messy in the middle of all that. We still deal with our sinful self and are tempted to withold glory from the Lord.
So back to the whole starting over thing. Coming into this year my mind was totally set on what my relationship with Jesus should look like in order for me to be happy this year...and be effective in ministry. But I think that stems from a wrong belief that I have to be something in order for God to use me.
Before you go off thinking that I'm going to talk about how His power is made perfect in weakness, and then lose you, I want to say something. There's something about all this that goes so much deeper. It's my life; it's who I am. It hits you harder when it's your life. Now, don't get me wrong. All the forementioned is good and true. And yes, this is a simple thought, but one that I honestly haven't wrestled with much. So I'm having to learn how to wrestle with it. And in this time, literally.
So maybe all I'm saying is that I'm finally at the point where I can be comfortable with this. It's sad that God had to use extreme measures to get me here, but that's how He deals with things. I don't understand it, but that's kinda beautiful.
Honestly, all this is still jumbled up in my head and not making much sense. But I have to start somewhere with this whole process. It will truly be a miracle if I grasp onto anything that God is teaching me. Please pray that it does.
caught in the middle,
Matt
Monday, October 22
fall retreat
- some students at the bonfire Saturday night
- our cabin in Rackova Dolina
Well, it's Monday night and I'm still recovering from our fall retreat this past weekend. Me, Aaron, Kelly, Biba, and Dara went up early on Friday to set up everything...including the sound and all the "ambiance." It was about 3 1/2 hours to Rackova Dolina, a remote little place in the Low Tatras...and very beautiful.
On the way up we started to notice that it was SNOWING! Now you must know that I haven't seen snow in about two years, so I was very excited about this. The closer we got to our destination, the more snow we started seeing. By Saturday morning the ground was covered with snow!
But, to rewind a little and talk about the weekend. The students arrived at about 7pm on Friday night. We all had dinner and then had our first meeting. Greg, a staff member in Budapest, came up to speak at our retreat. It was great to see a new face and get new perspective about things. The weekend's theme was "iskra v tme," which means "a spark in the dark." Our goal for the weekend was to provide a time when Slovak students could realize the fact that we are living in a dark world, and that only Christ can provide life in this dark world. Greg's first talk that night was, naturally, about sin and darkness of life. To me, it was good to hear, but it didn't seem that many of the students were very receptive to the topic. When talking to Stanley, a guy who I'm discipling, about what he thought, he mentioned that his buddy, Peter, has said that it was something he had heard many times in church...and didn't really think much about it. That was kind of discouraging, but forced me to pray for the next meeting.
Later that night I got to talk with Denis, another guy I am discipling this year. He is an awesome guy. He spent the last year in the states working and traveling. It has become much easier for Slovaks to travel to the states...especially since joining the european union. Anyways, we spent some time throwing the pigskin, aka football, and talking about life. I pretty much shared my testimony from the time I started walking with Christ in college until now. It's awesome to see how much my life story compares to his. I told him about my struggles during my senior year, and how God showed me so much grace in those times. He is in a similar position after being in the states for a year and not having much fellowship.
It is my prayer that this year I will be able to pour into him and help him restore fellowship with the Lord. I have been feeling very discouraged by not being able to meet more guys on campus and share my faith with them, so this opportunity to invest in Denis is so promising, and somewhat life-giving, to me. I definately have a passion for discipleship, and really want to use that passion to invest in these Slovak guys' lives.
So Saturday morning we had our second meeting, about "The Light of the World." It was refreshing to hear about Christ's provision and the hope He gives. I also heard good feedback from students about the message...a big answer to prayer. We had the afternoon free to go hiking, play games, whatever. I spent most of it taking a nap and trying to rest up for the remainder of the conference. I had to run all the technical aspects of the meetings, which took up most of my free time between meetings.
The talk on Saturday night was "being children of the light." Mostly, how do we, as Christians, live out our lives in Christ? Greg brought it from the Word, talking about living in the power of the Spirit, and in faith. It is something that we always have to return to and be reminded of constantly.
I had the opportunity during our time there to speak with Greg about a lot of things concerning our ministry here in Kosice; how we feel like nothing is working, how I feel overwhelmed and inadequate to lead this team, the hard soil in Slovakia, changing culture. It was good to hear a new perspective on it all and realize that I'm not an absolute failure. But one thing that Greg did remind me of is that we are not alone in this fight. We are not even fighting a battle of our own effort. We are fighting a spiritual battle:
"For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." I must constantly remember this while I'm here; I'm laboring against an unseen enemy, through the power of the Spirit. It's REALLY hard to do it, but I'm trying.
Also, one of the hopes that I continually must tell myself is that one day I will get to see how this year fit into the the Lord's plans of salvation for His chosen people. My prayer is that God would somehow use my efforts to bring people into His Kingdom. I'm not seeing the fruit now, but one day Jesus will tell me "well done good and faithful servant." That will all be worth it.
On Wednesday Kelly, Biba, and I are traveling to Budapest to meet with Doug. He is the country director for all of Slovakia. I'm really excited about getting some more insight into how to reach Slovaks this year and make this year effective. Please pray us.....we need it so badly.
praying for a movement,
Matt
Matt
Thursday, October 11
breakthrough
Today was our day with the Lord. If you don't know about it, it is when we, as a team, set aside one day a month to meet with the Lord all day. It is always a welcomed refreshment to just meet with Jesus and not have to think about ministry.
My day was really good. I spent lots of team reading, and stopped to spend some extended time on the be-attitudes in Matthew 5. I'm thinking I should spend a whole lot of time on them. So later in the day I was walking out of my flat to go read some more in Matthew.
I just needed to read the Gospel. It always gives me hope and refreshes me.
As I'm walking out the door I look over at the guys who are working on the building directly next to our flat...and realize that they are still working at 5:30pm. Now my first thought is, "Dude, it's quitin' time; go home."
Then it hits me.....I'm working, too. Seriously?
Yeah, seriously. Meeting with God and reading His word is in my job description. My time with God is counted towards my "working" hours. How stinkin' sweet is that?! You really can't beat that...not even with a five foot stick.
Even though it's hard, it's such a sweet job.
Life is hard no matter where you go, God just calls us to trust Him through whatever it is.
My day was really good. I spent lots of team reading, and stopped to spend some extended time on the be-attitudes in Matthew 5. I'm thinking I should spend a whole lot of time on them. So later in the day I was walking out of my flat to go read some more in Matthew.
I just needed to read the Gospel. It always gives me hope and refreshes me.
As I'm walking out the door I look over at the guys who are working on the building directly next to our flat...and realize that they are still working at 5:30pm. Now my first thought is, "Dude, it's quitin' time; go home."
Then it hits me.....I'm working, too. Seriously?
Yeah, seriously. Meeting with God and reading His word is in my job description. My time with God is counted towards my "working" hours. How stinkin' sweet is that?! You really can't beat that...not even with a five foot stick.
Even though it's hard, it's such a sweet job.
Life is hard no matter where you go, God just calls us to trust Him through whatever it is.
Sunday, September 30
waiting
I have been realizing that this year is more about waiting on the Lord than anything else. I somewhat knew this coming into this year, but I was so hyped up about the opportunity of coming here that I put that to the side.
Ministry is hard. Relationships here develop so much slower, and students are much less inclined toward spiritual things. Teams have been coming here for quite some time, but the relationships that are built are never fully developed, so trust is never fully given.
It's really frustrating.
But then I was pointed toward this passage recently. It is Psalm 27:14 which says, "Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."
Now, this was written by David when he was being chased by the current king of Israel, but after the Lord had promised to him that he would be king of Israel. The king was chasing David to kill him, and David even had the opportunity to kill Saul(I think it was Saul). But David waited.
David says, earlier in the Psalm, "One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I shall seek: That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord and to meditate in His temple."
David knew what was coming, and he soooo longed for it. I can indentify with David. I soooo want to seek His face and dwell in His house. I also, like David, desire to see the faithfulness of the Lord NOW. I desire to see Slovaks won to Christ; I want it NOW. I don't want to labor for a whole year and see nothing happen. I don't want to labor for one week and see nothing happen. It takes so much stinkin' effort to love these people, and to show the love of Christ through my life.
But I'm trying to learn how to wait on the Lord. I'm trying, like David, to be strong and let my heart take courage.
It's not easy...but I think it's worth it.
praying for strength and courage,
Matt
Ministry is hard. Relationships here develop so much slower, and students are much less inclined toward spiritual things. Teams have been coming here for quite some time, but the relationships that are built are never fully developed, so trust is never fully given.
It's really frustrating.
But then I was pointed toward this passage recently. It is Psalm 27:14 which says, "Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."
Now, this was written by David when he was being chased by the current king of Israel, but after the Lord had promised to him that he would be king of Israel. The king was chasing David to kill him, and David even had the opportunity to kill Saul(I think it was Saul). But David waited.
David says, earlier in the Psalm, "One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I shall seek: That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord and to meditate in His temple."
David knew what was coming, and he soooo longed for it. I can indentify with David. I soooo want to seek His face and dwell in His house. I also, like David, desire to see the faithfulness of the Lord NOW. I desire to see Slovaks won to Christ; I want it NOW. I don't want to labor for a whole year and see nothing happen. I don't want to labor for one week and see nothing happen. It takes so much stinkin' effort to love these people, and to show the love of Christ through my life.
But I'm trying to learn how to wait on the Lord. I'm trying, like David, to be strong and let my heart take courage.
It's not easy...but I think it's worth it.
praying for strength and courage,
Matt
Wednesday, September 26
hurting
Do you ever spend a lot of time praying and thinking about something, asking God for wisdom and discernment? You finally reach a decision, it's settled. Then things around you start to threaten that decision, forces out of your control. People start to make decisions which will effect you, but all you can do is pray that the Lord makes those decisions.
Yeah, those are tough.
I'm going through that right now. It kinda hurts to let it go. But I'm learning the beauty of finding contentment in Jesus' plans for me.
hurting,
Matt
Yeah, those are tough.
I'm going through that right now. It kinda hurts to let it go. But I'm learning the beauty of finding contentment in Jesus' plans for me.
hurting,
Matt
Wednesday, September 19
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)